Tuesday, 16 April 2019

WHY TODAY'S MATERNITY & PATERNITY POLICIES ARE OUTDATED AND OLD FASHIONED



Hey guys. It's been a while. Working full time has had an impact on my posts and I've just not felt very inspired to write anything. This is until today, I saw a post on LinkedIn that sparked rage deep inside. I wanted to share this post with you and tell you exactly what my thoughts are on today's policies on maternity and paternity leave. 


So this is the post that inspired me to write today's entry. It reads:

"After 17 years in the industry, with the last 5 years being in senior leadership positions, has my career and experience really been scratched because I took 12 months off to have a baby? In the past few weeks, I have been chased by recruiters for 4 different roles. "Perfect fit" roles, according to them. However, all are junior, and all were paying at least $70k less than what I earnt before I went on leave.

"I'm assuming you're wanting something slow paced and less demanding", or this doozy "digital has changed a lot in a year so you might not be at the top of the game anymore". This should not be a thing. Ever.
I now understand why so many women leave media and advertising after having a baby. I won't be, but I now get why so many do."

How is this fair? Why are women subject to this?

I actually replied to this message with the following:


This reads:

"The whole maternity & paternity policies in place are outdated and were made to accommodate the old fashioned ways of working where the man went to work and the woman stayed at home.
Jump to today and women have just as much of a career as men, yet these policies haven't changed? How is this fair that women are disadvantaged solely because they have made the decision to create life? Why do I have to choose between my career or having children? This should not impact my chances of progression and its fundamentally wrong. I hope all businesses learn from this and ensure that their women (who are just as capable - or even more capable than their male colleagues) are able to come back to work and progress in their careers exactly the same as any male colleague. It's time to change the rules and societies expectations when it comes to working women who decide to start a family".

SO what are my exact thoughts on this issue?

1. These policies are completely outdated.

As mentioned in my rant, these policies were made back when women would typically stay at home whilst the man went to work. But the thing is, women work just as much as men do now. So why hasn't this changed to reflect that?

2. Women need to work.

The world is an expensive place to live in. It might have been sufficient to live off one person's income a few years ago, but now that is hardly the case. Life is fucking expensive. Most people need two incomes to be able to survive in this economy. Yet, women suffer as a result of creating life as they come back to work and don't get offered the same opportunities as before. How is this fair?

4. What about men? Don't they want to spend time with their child too?

These policies are still biased towards the woman being the predominant career of the child/children. But what if the man wants to take the lead? Why is it fair they only get in some cases 1 week to experience their newborn child. It's not fair that they have to miss some of the most important moments just because of an old fashioned policy.

5. What about same-sex couples?

Plenty of same-sex couples have children too. But there are no clear policies for this. I remember seeing a story on twitter about two females. One was allowed the full maternity, whilst the other only received 2 weeks as they weren't the one giving birth. Yet both are mothers to this child?

6. How are businesses supporting these new mums? They aren't.

A lot of businesses are not supporting women. They come back after giving birth with no opportunities for progression or in some cases, even lower pay grades. And how are new mums expected to follow a 9-5 working schedule? Why aren't these businesses offering flexible working hours?

I could go on all day about these issues. But what really needs to happen is change. I hope by the time I have children I'm not in the posistion as many mothers are now. I hope things get better.

Love Rebecca Ashley x



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Thursday, 25 October 2018

8 SIGNS YOU'RE ADULTING


Hey guys. Today we are going to chat about "how you can tell you are adulting". I'm 21 if you didn't already know. Being 21 is a weird time. Some of your friends are engaged or with kids, some are still living at home. For me, 21 has been an introduction into an actual, somewhat adult life.

Now I'm not saying that I act like an adult all the time. In fact, I can pretty immature. But sometimes I'm like "wow, is this what being an adult is like?" So here I am, sharing these thoughts with you all today. 

1. Commenting on how you are impressed with household items

"Wow, our mop is amazing, look at how much it picked up!?" 

Admiring household objects is really a sign your becoming an adult, isn't it? You even have moments where you think "Jesus, I sound like my mum, but she was right about that whizz mop, it's great". 

2. You know what council tax is

This is something I've learnt recently. Who knew council tax was so expensive? I mean I pay it, but I'm not 100% sure what my money is actually doing. 

3. F*cking electric meters

I'm sorry but if you are reading an electric meter like a pro you defo have entered the grown-up club. This is still something I haven't quite mastered, due to the fact my electric meter was installed before B.C. 

4. "Sorry, I can't come out tonight, I have work at 9"

Oh, the work excuse. But instead, you are actually worried about how a hangover can affect your work. The sesh is no longer prioritised like it used to be. 

5. I'd rather just go to the pub

Nightclubs just don't have the same appeal now you pay council tax. You see all the 17-year-olds and freshers and it just makes you feel old. 

Plus, what happened to good old conversation? The pub doesn't bang music so loud that you can actually talk to people. 

6. When you sit in a room of younger people and cringe because you remember how cringey you were

The other day I had a funny experience with this exact same thing. I went to a house party and most the people there were a little younger than me, maybe in their second or first year at uni.

I sat and listened to these wild students communicate with each other. I sat and cringed to myself, thinking how embarrassing I was in this period of my life as well. Long story short, it made me feel old. 

7. I don't give a fuck what I look like

Gone are the days when I took 2 hours to get ready for something. 2 hours!! I used to sit for days making my makeup perfect and curling hair. 

It takes me about 10-15 mins to get ready for work now. Somehow, sleep seems more important than my appearance now. Don't get me wrong, I still like to dress up now and again but for the most part, I really don't give a f*ck. 

8. General moaning

I mean I think this one is a bit obvious. This whole post is literally me moaning. I am an adult. 

Hope you found this post somewhat amusing! Let me know your 'adulting experiences'. 

Love Rebecca Ashley x
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Thursday, 18 October 2018

WHY BEING AN "AVERAGE" CLOTHING SIZE IS ANNOYING


Hey guys! Welcome back to the "Rebecca moans for 10 mins blog". Today I want to express my displeasure about being an "average" sized women. 

Now before you get it twisted, "average" doesn't really exist and all women are completely different. But if you had to fit me into a category, it would probably be this one.

So what I mean by "average" is like around the 12-16 size mark. Not Instagram size 8. Not beautiful curves size 18. Just somewhere in the middle really. The reason I say "average" is because I feel like a lot of women fit in this kind of size category. I myself am around a 12, but UK's average is 16. So basically, these are things I find annoying being in this "average" clothing size category. 

1. No stock

This is literally the reason why I am the queen of online shopping. Every time I go to the high street, I finally find something I think is cute.. but of course, there is none of my size left.

The thing is, a lot of women are around 12-14 size, so obviously these sizes sell out quicker. But its just annoying! If the sizes are always gone, maybe the retailers should stock more of these sizes? 

It's not just the high street that is guilty. So many times Asos has announced they are doing 20% off, so I go to my saved items with the intention of buying and behold... my size is sold out. Shocking. 

2. Being basically 4 different sizes on different parts of your body

Every woman is different. We all have different curves in different places. So obviously, half the time we aren't just one basic size. I find that I end up having to buy bigger sizes for my bottom half and smaller for my top for example.

It's like guesswork. Will a size 12 fit my booty in? But a 14 might be too big on the legs? 

3. Not to mention inconsistency of brands

To make this whole "figuring your size" thing out harder, even brands can't decide what is really a size 12 or 16. One min your shopping on Missguided and fitting in size 10s, the next minute you're in Topshop trying on a size 16. 

This really isn't great for our self-esteem either. Brands should just decide what sizes are what and be done with it. Best thing to do is ignore the number and concentrate on the fit. 

4. Everything is fucking cropped

The story of my life. You know when you see a cute top, you pick it up and realise its cropped? 

Like, a bit of crop here and there is fine but my body isn't really built for a nice crop top on a daily basis. So many missed opportunities and heartbreaks *sighs dramatically*. 

5. There is not many 'average sized' influencers/models

This is the most annoying part of living in the "Instagram generation". I love looking at all the influencer's outfits and how cute they look. But the problem is, a lot of the time these beautiful girls have a completely different build to me. So I feel like I wouldn't want to buy the same clothes as I have no idea how it will really look on me.

Pinterest is probably the worst for this. I want to use Pinterest to build ideas for my wardrobe, but it can be hard imagining what these clothes would like on someone a lil' curvier. 

It would just be nice to see a bit more variety that's all I'm saying - shoutout to @emmasrectangle for being the queen.

6. "Yeah that is so cute, just not on me"

Forever seeing cute clothes but thinking "it just won't look as nice on me". It's a daily struggle and so many cute clothes are denied attention because you think something like that won't suit you. 

7. Hello black jeans and baggy top

So instead you opt for the same usual attire. Yes, this is very comfy and can look pretty cute but secretly you want to be edgy as f*ck too and this just doesn't cut it. 

8. No one is one size

But the biggest and most important thing to remember is no one is exactly the same. We all have curves in different places and we need to rock it. 

Love Rebecca Ashley x
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Thursday, 11 October 2018

REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD MOVE TO ANOTHER TOWN/CITY



Hey guys! I'm going to try and get back into the flow of writing - pretty sure I say that every time - but this time I'm serious (I think). Today, I wanted to chat about my experience moving to a different city and why I think its a good idea. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of negatives, but instead of moaning, I thought I'd try and be positive, lol. 

1. You grow up

Let's just start with the biggest one.

When you move anywhere else but home, you are obviously going to mature in the process. You are taking yourself away from your support system and moving to unknown territory. You're obviously going to mature and grow up.

I have matured so much since the day my mum dropped me off in Leeds over 3 years ago, which leads me to the next point... 

2. You become independent 

You've gotta handle your own shit.

Like I said, you're leaving your little bubble behind and you have no choice but to learn to do things yourself. You learn to look after yourself, how to pay bills, how to travel, everything. I am literally the queen of public transport after moving out without a car, which is actually really handy. 

3. You gain new experiences 

You are somewhere totally new. It is obviously going to be completely different to what you are used to. 

I found this especially right, moving from a tiny town to a big city. Everything was different, but I loved it. I loved the buzz and the ability to pretty much do whatever you want. There are perks to every different place, but you might not experience them until you are there for yourself. 

4. New friends 

Obviously, you are always going to have your home-town friends. It might even teach you a lesson or two about who your real friends are. But you will also meet amazing people on your new journey. 




Likely hood is, if you move out as a student, you will have to share your accommodation with other people. Obviously, there are going to be people you don't get on with (which adds to the growing up part) but there will be people you can't envision not being part of your life anymore. 

5. New opportunities

I guess this was the biggest reason I moved away. I wanted to go to university and there isn't a local Mansfield Uni - or not anything near what I wanted. Its the same for when you are looking for work. Moving will open you up to new opportunities and its great.  

Obviously, moving away won't be for everyone and there is plenty of reasons why staying in your hometown is amazing. I'm just trying to express how moving away has potentially shaped me into a better version of myself and has given me a better life. 

Don't be scared to make the move. 

Love Rebecca Ashley x
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Thursday, 4 October 2018

WHAT IS IT REALLY LIKE WHEN YOU FINISH UNI?


Hey guys! Long time, no see. I think that happens when you enter adult life - you lose track of the things you love doing. Which is what actually inspired me to write this post.

It's that time of year where everyone is going back or starting university and this is the first time in 3 years where I've not been one of them. I graduated this summer, after what felt like the quickest, yet best, 3 years of my life. 

Everyone always talks about what uni is like and the ups and downs, but no one really seems to acknowledge what it's like leaving. Its a weird time for all people graduating and there are only really a few options we can choose from to do next:

A - Find a job
B - Carry on studying
C - Take a gap year

Most people try and go with option A. But really option A isn't as easy as people think. It's a weird time, some people manage to grab a job straight away, some are applying for jobs months after they have graduated with no success. 

Everyone enters a weird limbo stage where we have finally been cast out into the adult world and we don't really know how to deal with it. I lot of people find they love this "adult world", others hate it. There is this strange feeling inside most of us wishing we were those students again, just starting uni for the first time. 

If you are lucky enough to choose option A and actually land a job, it's like adult life hits you all at once. You go from doing 2 days at uni barely making your 9am's to a full-time 9-5 schedule. You spend the first month just basically recovering from the shock. Your social life can take a back seat when you only have 2 days a week for yourself. It's hard to get used to the whole thing and find a balance. 

To add to the craziness, if you made the decision not to move back home, there are all these other responsibilities that hit you. Goodbye student loan that helped me pay my rent and hello council tax.. who knew council tax was so bloody expensive? 

So here we are, watching all the students return to uni with a slight envy wishing we were still in their position. I heard a lot of people on Twitter calling it 'post-uni depression' but idk how deep you want to get into it. 

But the reality is, we should be proud of what we have accomplished. We have finished our time studying and we fucking smashed it. It's easy to forget all the hard work that you've done, especially when you are so confused about your current situation and what to do. It may even feel like a waste to some people who are struggling to find their path.

But you should be fucking proud of yourself, whatever you've ended up doing. The fact is, most of us are all in the same shoes, trying to figure out our next move and what we want to do with our lives. 

Just remember to take a step back and be like - hell yeah, so now what? 

Love Rebecca Ashley Beauty x
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Wednesday, 8 August 2018

REASONS WHY I'M NOT A 'TYPICAL' BLOGGER



Hey guys! So it's been a while since I've done a written post. Which is actually how I came up with the idea for this post. I want to talk about why I am not a 'typical' blogger. It's not necessarily a bad or a good thing. I mean no offence to you amazing bloggers out there who fit this 'typical' category. But I don't belong to a 'category' really. This is a light-hearted post and I'm sure a lot of bloggers can relate to this.

1. I don't schedule 

So you probably already know this one if you are a regular reader and it's certainly not hard to figure out. I used to keep to a blogging schedule once upon a time. I used to try and post 2 times a week and write posts in advance to make sure they were put out on time.

 A lot of successful bloggers go on about how consistency is key. But personally, I don't think I should be pumping out content unless I am truly passionate about my work. I went through a rut of pumping out posts for the sake of it. But I stopped and thought "if I was a reader, would I open this and read it?" If the answer is no, then why am I bothering? 

I mean I might have taken it too far to the other end of the scale and have not posted enough, but I want to find the right balance again. I won't write content for the sake of it and from now on I only want to post stuff I am somewhat proud of. I think that's reasonable, right? 

2. I write posts at the weirdest time 

This one expands on my f*cked up schedule. But, I really do write posts at the weirdest times. To keep the passion I only really write stuff when inspiration hits. Unluckily for me, this tends to be at like 3am when I have to be awake for 7am the next day. But I don't really care, this is my hobby and I write things because I enjoy doing it... so why not do it at 3am in the morning? 

3. I can't decide what I want to write about 

So, you would think with a blog name like 'Rebecca Ashley Beauty' I would have this one figured out. But no, for some reason I am really random with what I write about. In fact, most of my posts lately have rarely been about beauty.

 But I don't care about staying 'on brand' and I will write things that I enjoy writing. This goes for my latest YouTube videos as well. I have fun making them and I don't mind that they aren't very 'beauty' related. 

It's funny because when people ask what I blog about it can be really hard for me to answer that question. I tend to just start listing off loads of things whilst the persons face is like (??!?). But it's cool. 

4. I am not perfect

I think this is one of the biggest things that differentiate me from a lot of bloggers in this category. I don't strive to be that 'perfect life' kind of blogger, because it isn't me. I am spontaneous, all over the place and most of all, I am human. Humans are not perfect. 

I'd like people to read my posts and think to themselves, 'wow, I don't need to be perfect' rather than thinking 'wow, I wish I was like her'. "It's just me being real babe" (pls say you read that in a Georgia from love island voice). 

5. I try to be some-what relatable 

This kind of goes along with the whole imperfect vibe. I want to chat with you guys like you're my mates and we are chilling, having a pint and eating pizza together. I write like I talk for that reason. I don't mind using swear words, I am not going to dim-down my content because I am worried about posts not making money. I am just myself and people either enjoy that or they don't. 

6. I am sh*t at getting nice blog photos

I always see bloggers tweeting about how perfectionist they are about taking photos or how much time they take getting photos for their blog. I'm not really like that. 

I get visuals are important, but I am not going to spend all my time concentrating on perfection. I'm not afraid to use stock photos if I need to. Besides, it's pretty hard to take blog photos and I respect bloggers that are good at it. Living on my own, it can be hard to get people to take photos of me, so sometimes I don't. (But thanks to my boyf Ryan for being somewhat of an 'Instagram boyfriend'.) 

7. I don't care about statistics

I think one of the biggest things I see in the blogging community is how they are always looking at statistics like "I am nearly at XXX amount of followers", "XXX amount of people read my post", "only XXX people retweeted my post" etc. 

I totally understand how looking at these things is important but I think it can easily turn something from a hobby into a chore. So I just tend to not really bother. If I enjoy it, that is all that matters to me and if other people enjoy it too that is a bonus. 

8. I don't care about making money 

I know that most bloggers don't care about this, but I think it is worth saying. Money is not the motivation behind my posts and neither is free stuff. Yeah, it's lovely to earn money for a hobby but it is not the main concentration.

 This is why I don't bother with ads on my blog post. I find them distracting when you are trying to read someone's post and they aren't really worthwhile. Don't get me wrong, I am happy to do sponsored posts and have done in the past. The difference is, I will only do them if I think they are beneficial to my readers and I enjoy the content I am writing about. 

9. I don't really network much 

This kinda goes along with the last point, but I don't go out of my way to network. I'm not interested in having loads of brands on my blog. If I like something I will write about it.

However, I think it is defo worth reaching out to brands as a blogger if you are really interested in working with them. Don't wait for them to make the first move because you could be waiting a long time. 

10. I look like sh*t half the time  

OK, so I know I talk about beauty and fashion, but I don't look like some sort of Instagram model IRL. I'd be lucky to wear makeup every day, never mind wearing makeup that looks ON POINT. I just enjoy doing it on special occasions rather than being some master-class MUA every day. Plus, I love wearing clothes that basically resemble PJs when possible. Baggy t-shirts and trainers are my general vibe.

I hope you found me somewhat amusing in this post, if not true. 

Love Rebecca Ashley x


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Monday, 30 July 2018

GRADUATE FASHION WEEK // LONDON 2018


Hey guys! Long time, no see (or read, I guess). I've been rather busy of late, meaning I've had little time to get back into blogging. Just so you get a little life update, I've now graduated from uni and I've just started a full-time job whilst fully moving back to Leeds (yeah, you've missed quite a bit). However, I will do my best to pick up the pace with my blog posts again.

How about we kick things off by letting you all know about another vlog I posted lately? I really enjoyed filming this one. I went to Graduate Fashion Week over summer (which now feels like a decade ago). This is actually one of my favourite videos I've edited and created, so I would really appreciate you guys taking a few minutes of your time to have a watch. 

I hope you enjoy the video and I promise you will hear from me soon with some more exciting posts and videos. The video is just below. 



Love Rebecca Ashley x
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